Wednesday 2 December 2009

Simply The Test


Once again I found myself driving through Nottingham in rush hour, and once again I was at the wheel of the Scania that I’ve been taking my driving tests in – rather more than I , and the company accountants, had hoped for as it happens.  Today, however, was different – because I finally passed my class 1 test with an excellent result that I’m pleased with.


If I looked like this, I'd have passed first time.  Allegedly.

 I’m sure it is not a coincidence that my examiner for this test was a very pleasant man in his fifties, who has driven trucks for a living, and understands that manoeuvring artics around modern, overcrowded cities is very different in practise to the written word.  He wasn’t there just to tick boxes on a form; he was looking for a safe, comfortable journey in a vehicle driven with confidence and competence.  Like it used to be in the old days before they started hiring graduates who can say all the right things at interview, but couldn’t reverse a loaded artic into Tesco’s loading bay without ending up in the cereals and condiments aisle.

I’d had a very good trip over to the test centre, which improved my confidence and put me in the right frame of mind.  When I saw that my examiner wasn’t young enough to be my grandson and could see out of the windscreen without a booster seat, things improved no end.  I also liked his manner – he spoke to me like a person, and didn’t just recite the script that seems to have been issued to all the kiddies that the Government are giving these posts to now.  I’ve heard it enough times to know it off by heart – think I’ll set it to music and enter next year’s Britain’s Got Talent with the Driving Test Two-Step.

The exam got off to a good start with a cracking reverse and brake test, and out on the roads followed in the same vein.  As I was feeling calm and in control, I was able to take all the horrors of Nottingham traffic and roadworks in my stride, with plenty of time to assess and plan my way through the minefield of the test route.  Back at the centre, the coupling exercise went well, and that was that – a happy end to a relatively pleasant exam.  The only area I let myself down on was some undue hesitation when entering a section of roadworks; a tricky situation given narrow lanes and parked cars.  I failed the last test due to being too close to parked cars, so today I erred on the side of caution and hung back until there was an established gap and then used all the road I wanted.  So although I did the correct procedure, it turned out that I left thinking about a bit too long before deciding to move off.  Because the examiner could see why I was doing what I was doing, however, this was marked as a minor fault only – and certainly preferable to charging straight down without thinking about it.  That comes after the test is over.

Tomorrow I start my proper driving on a Mercedes Actros with a 9-car trailer.  In the meantime, while I’m not saying that I was a regular visitor to the Test Centre, my personal and private parking bay is now being auctioned off on Ebay.  Happy bidding!


"When I said take a shunt, I was talking to the train driver, you moron!"

3 comments:

  1. Congratulations, Martyn! I think you have had some particularly difficult examiners, to be honest. Well done, mate!

    By the way, were you talking about me when you said about reversing into the cereals and condiments aisle??

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  2. Thanks Iain, it's a huge relief to have cracked it. Supermarkets - that's a long story told to me by one of my fellow drivers, who's been at it for over 30 years. He's got some fascinating tales from the past, and I hope to re-tell some them of here at some stage as they are very entertaining indeed! The supermarket incident was down south, when a brand new branch was opened in the 80's. He took the first delivery down, and discovered that the loading bay was located directly off a roundabout, and was only forty feet long - the hotshot designers had only made it long enough for the trailer, so the cab wouldn't fit! Not knowing this, he ploughed backwards to clear the roundabout ... More convenient for the shelf stackers to have the truck unloading in the actual store, I suppose... Lots more where this came from; hope to be able to jot them down one day.

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  3. Looking forward to reading those stories!

    Morissons in Aberdeen is very similar. An employee has to come out and reverse you in off the roundabout, which is the only one for the store, so no pressure. Glad I don't have to do it...there'd be no loading bay left.

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